


Not Agian

by CharMarStein



Series: Never Agian [3]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Cutting, Depression, Gen, Self-Harm, Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-27
Updated: 2014-10-27
Packaged: 2018-02-22 20:03:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2520050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CharMarStein/pseuds/CharMarStein
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He really didn't mean for it to happen again, but he couldn't help it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Agian

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos as always are welcome.

'It doesn't matter' he thought to himself as the blade cut through his skin. 'I wont do it again after this.' Niall had just finished dinner with the rest of the boys and unfortunately noticed to late that he had ordered way more than they had. He was taking out the embarrassment and the self conscience feeling of being fat on his hip. Three deep marks bleeding down his thigh. He added another for not being able to keep himself from the blade and then two more just for good measure.

"Niall you ok in there, you've been gone for hours!" Louis said through the door. Niall looked at the clock and rolled his eyes at the boy behind the door, it had only been ten minutes. "You promised you would watch a movie with me and Liam keeps trying to choose. We all know how that will turn out so get your little ass out here before we get stuck with another Disney movie." Even though Niall couldn't see the older boy he could just imagine his bottom lip stuck out and his blue eyes widened to make them look bigger. That boy sure did know how to pout. 

"Alright I'll be right out, give me a minute." Niall replied before slicing into his leg one more time. He couldn't believe he had let himself do this while the boys were so close. He then cleaned up around the sink hiding the blade in the bottom drawer and walking out to join the rest of the boys on the couch. "What are we watching?"

"Don't know yet." Harry mumbled from the cabinet full of DVDs. His curly mop the only thing Niall was able to see over the door.

 

******** *************** ***************************** ***************** **************

He had done it again, he spilled his coffee all over Zayn. He had tried to catch it but by the time his hands got to the cup the dark liquid was already landing on Zayn's white shirt. "Shit" both boys gasped out at the same time. Niall's eyes filled with tears and he opened his mouth to apologize but before he could Zayn held up his hand for silence and got up to go to the bathroom. "It's fine." He threw over his shoulder.

Niall quickly cleaned up the mess and rushed of to his own bathroom before Zayn got back. He was so angry at himself, how could he be so clumsy and in front of Zayn. He opened the bottom drawer and franticly searched for the thin piece of metal that he knew would make him feel better. When his fingers finally found it he let out a breath that he didn't know he was holding. The blade going through his skin was such a relief, he felt so much better after he had two new lines etched into his skin. He cleaned up with hope in his eyes, looking himself in the mirror he said, "Never Again" and walked back out to join Zayn. He didn't put to much thought into the fact that he wasn't really sure what he was going to never do again.


End file.
